Thailand in the eyes of a 20-something..: Pattaya

So the original plan was to head to Cambodia this weekend to see Angor Wat, but since HR decided to hold my passport hostage and told me they'd terminate my contract if I left the country(AFTER I'd already booked tickets; jerks), Colin invited me to join him and his wife Na in Pattaya for the weekend. Left straight from work Friday afternoon, took a taxi to the bus station, then a 3 and a half hour-ish bus ride to Pattaya. For those who haven't yet googled Pattaya, it's a beach town, like Santa Cruz...only not like Santa Cruz lol. More Russians, for one thing. One Russian chick outside my hotel looked lost, so I walked over to her and she rattled of something in Russian. I looked her square in the eye and, making sure to pronounce every syllable with clarity, said, "I only speak ENGLISH." She held up a cigarette and asked, "Fire?" I laughed...and said no. lol

Friday night the three of us met for dinner, then headed to walking street...for about ten minutes and decided we were too tired to walk further and we'd do that street later. Saturday morning I was up bright and early, had breakfast at my hotel, then managed to get the only taxi driver who didn't know how to read a map. I don't even live there, and I knew he was going the wrong way. Anyway, he finally got me to the Elephant Village, where I chose the combination tour, which included elephant trekking, a hike through the jungle, a raft ride to feed zillions of catfish, an ox cart ride, and lunch. Oh and apparently sword fighting. Thankfully it also included a van to take us back to our hotels.
Hit the beach, rented a jet ski for an hour, and then had a delicious dinner at the Hongsa Kitchen before meeting up with Colin and Na for the Tiffany Show at 9pm. The Tiffany show is dazzling and sparkling with fabulous choreography and excellent sets and musical numbers....all performed by ladyboys. ALL. ah..fun times.
Sunday brought even more fun. I grabbed my backpack, laced up my tennis shoes, and set out in search of a motorbike to rent for the day. I found one on Soi 6(they're everywhere, but this was the first one I came to), and the lady refused to rent me one because she said I didn't have experience. Hmph. Well, stubborn as I am, I was determined to ride a motorbike, so I wandered off in search of someone who would rent me one. Lo and behold, two Sois down, I found one. But before I approached them, I called up Colin(since he's been riding motorbikes "his whole life"), and he came to help me out so I didn't end up sprawled out under a truck somewhere. We found a good one, Colin drove us off to get "petrol," and then we went to the side streets so he could show me how to control the beast. Well the beast was only semi-tame, and although I managed to go back and forth up and down the streets a few times, it did a number on my left calf, and I gave up. I believe I had the bike for no more than two hours when we drove it back into the rental place. The guy looked surprised to see me back so soon until I showed him what that monster did to my leg, and his gaze darted instantly to the bike(which was unharmed). He handed me back my deposit, and I bought Colin a beer to thank him for his trouble. Na met us at the beach(it started raining, we grabbed lunch under cover, then went back out on the sand) and while she ate her seafood, Colin and I talked her into going out on a jet ski with me. She finally agreed, but then got nervous about 50 yards out and I brought her back to land. Finished my half hour, headed back to the hotel to wash off all the salt water in the pool haha, then showered and headed out to walking street to meet them for dinner and sightseeing.
Checked out this morning, taxi-ed to the bus station, and we got back to MoChit at around 2pm. I plan on spending tomorrow doing laundry and propping up my swollen ankle. :D
My room at the Grand Sole Beach Hotel